Monday, June 25, 2012

adventure is out there!

While I am currently going through a whole bag of emotions about my vacation and eventual move to Europe, I have also taken stock in understanding that this is the moment where all my decisions to change my life are coming to fruition.  My little sister is pregnant with her second child, and while having a baby is a wonderful and miraculous experience, I shared with her that I understand how even though there are some experiences that are wonderful, it doesn't mean they aren't hard, in fact, most wonderful things come about from tests of extreme endurance, heart, strength, and faith.  My adventure is one of those things, but what would life be without them?  Thankfully I am a person who loves and embraces change, is excited to see life from many angles, but that doesn't mean I am not scared.  Game of Thrones taught me two things last season, that if you're not scared of a great adventure, then you're stupid, and that there can be no bravery if there is no fear. So I take great meaning from the feelings I am having, and know that instead of shying away from them I can swim through them, one strong stroke at a time, and hopefully I can remember to stay present enough to remember the experience in order to fully reap the rewards of it.

Being ill has had its challenges, and as I'm approaching my 30's it becomes more clear how much of a normal 20's experience I have missed... but I comfort myself remembering that most lives are not normal at all, especially not the ones of heroes.  Even though I didn't accomplish certain goals I thought I might have, I have also done things I never thought I would ever in my life be able to do.. become an animator and filmmaker, win a presentation competition at Walt Disney Imagineering, live and travel abroad for 9 months with a backpack when I was only 20 years old, complete graduate school and receive my MFA from UCLA, I got to come full circle back to LA and become part of a community that changes the world with art, I had the opportunity to grow up with my parents and siblings who taught me more about love and myself than I ever could have learned elsewhere, I become a producer of a 500+ guest film festival and reception two years in a row, I've had the opportunity to work professionally (with the most FANTASTIC clients!!!) as an artist and animator, and find my compadres, my people, and my best friends in the world in my graduate school program. My tribe! My TRIBE! I found my tribe and am sooo blessed to know you all.

The role spirit plays in all of this is the greatest of all, not because I believe some external extraterrestrial is guiding the forces of my life, because spirit is what is within me that can witness the greatness, the bigness, and the small tiny wonderfulness of my life and my experiences. Spirit is what keeps my treasures the delicate tastes of the now rather than something to be pursued in a never-existent future.  Spirit is what reminds me that this IS the game, and Adventure is OUT THERE because it is IN HERE first.

Watch this space... life is happening.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...